Smriti Mukta Phalam
103. Parivedanam (Marriage of younger brother before the elder)
1. Garga - When the elder brother born of the same mother is
unmarried, his younger brother should not marry. When the elder
brother has not done Aadhanam, the younger brother should not do
Aadhanam; if he does, he will be a fallen man.
2. Yama - If the younger brother marries and does Aadhanam before
his father’s brother’s sons, or his father’s other wife’s sons,
there is no fault.
3. Saatatapa - The younger brother does not attract any fault if
he marries ahead of an elder who is a eunuch, lives in a distant
country, fallen man, sanyasi or one who is attached to yogasastra.
4. Katyayana - The younger brother does not attract any fault if
he marries ahead of an elder who lives in a distant country, is a
eunuch, has a single testicle, of a different mother, is attached
to prostitute, fallen man, is akin to sudra, very ill, inert,
dumb, blind, deaf, hunchback, dwarf, bereft of limbs, old, eternal
brahmachari, likes agriculture related to king, likes expanding
wealth, is detached from marriage, cheat, mad or thief. In such
cases the elder brother also does not attract the fault of
Parivitti. Inert or dumb man can also marry. Still if the younger
brother marries before him, there is no fault.
5. Parasara - If the elder brother has gone to another country for
dharma or wealth, the younger brother should wait for him for 12
years.
6. Vasishtha - If the elder brother, who has gone to another
country for dharma or wealth, is not married and is not doing
Agnihotram, the younger brother should wait for him for 12 years.
If the elder has gone for any other purpose, the younger should
wait for him for 8 to 10 years.
7. Gautama - If the elder brother, who has gone to another country
as a student, is not married and has not done Aadhanam, the
younger brother should wait for him for 12 years.
8. Sankar - Same as vasishtha.
9. Waiting thus is in respect of one who is not mad etc. In
Chandrika also - It is not proper to wait for one who is mad,
sinner, fallen, eunuch or who suffers from consumptive disease. In
the case of mad, inert, eunuch and fallen men, there is no
marriage, samskara, Aasoucham (defilement) or udakadanam. Manu
says that Arka marriage can be done for them.
10. Manu and Saatatapa - The younger brother who marries and
performs Agnihotram when his elder
brother is not married is known as Parivetta; the elder is known
as Parivitti.
11. Parasara - Parivitti, Parivetta, the wife of Parivetta, one
who gave her in danam and the Purohit who performed that marriage
- all five go to naraka. The fault of Parivedana is not attracted
in the case of hunchback, dwarf, eunuch, stammerer,inert, blind
from birth, deaf and dumb men. In the case of the son of father’s
brother or of step - mother, there is no fault of Parivedana. The
younger brother, who is Parivetta, has no right for Agni, Vedas,
tapas and sraadham. When the elder sister is due for marriage, but
not married, the younger sister should not go for marriage. In
case the elder sister has any defect, there is no fault in the
marriage of the younger sister.
12. Parasara again - The younger sister who gets married ahead of
her elder sister is called ‘Agredidhishu’, whereas the elder
sister in this case is called ‘Didhishu’.
13. Bodhayana - Parivitti, Parivetta, the wife of Parivetta, one
who gave her in danam and the Purohit who performed that marriage
- all five go to naraka.
14. In case the younger sister has ‘Patityam’, Prayaschittam has
to be done before her marriage. Yama - In case the girl commits
the sin in youth without discrimination, her father has to follow
the rules for half the Prayaschittam. She has to be married only
after purification through Prayaschittam. If not, the man who
marries her will also become ‘Patita’ (fallen).
15. Vyasa says that if one marries a Patita, he becomes also
Patita. One who shares Patita’s vehicle, bed, seat etc. for one
year knowingly becomes also a Patita. One who does yagna,
marriage, Vedic teaching and eating food knowingly with a Patita
becomes a Patita instantly.
16. Devala - Same as above.
17. Aapasthambha - Even after Prayaschittam, one should not have
any relationship with a Patita.
18. Aapasthambha proves logically that children born to Patitas
are also Patitas. He refutes the argument that the children born
to a Patita man cannot be Patitas as his wife is not a Patita.
Haaritha is also of the same view. Because - Woman is like the pot
for curd. If one makes ghee out of curd made in a pot with milk
touched by a dog, that ghee is not used for yagas etc. Similarly
good people do not relate to a child born of semen defiled by
being in the body of a Patita.
19. Bodhayana - One who is associated with a Patita for one year
becomes also Patita. One who does yagna, marriage and Vedic
teaching with a Patita becomes a Patita instantly.
20. Bodhayana also - Children born of Patitas, if desired, should
do Prayaschittam, ¾ of that for a Patita. This also applies to
women.
21. Male child of Patita becomes Patita; not female child.
Vasishtha says that daughter of Patita can be accepted in marriage
without dowry and after doing Prayaschittam.
22. Yagnavalkya - Same as above.
23. Haaritha also - Daughter of Patita should be made to fast for
a whole day without clothes, made to wear white clothes the next
morning and utter loudly that she does not belong to family of
Patita, nor they belong to her and then she can be accepted in
marriage on the banks of a tirtha or at his home.
24. Yagnavalkya says about the benefit of such marriage - As the
maintenance of lineage by the birth of son, grandson and great -
grandson and attainment of Swarga by following dharma are possible
only in association with women, women should be protected.
104. Method of Protecting Women
1. Manu - Men should always ensure no freedom for their women.
They should keep women attached to worldly matters under their
control. Father before marriage, husband during youth and son
during old age should protect a woman. Woman does not deserve
freedom. Women should be protected carefully even from association
with minor evils. If not protected, they might cause misery to
both the lineages. Knowing this dharma as the best for all varnas,
even weak husbands should protect their wives. One who protects
his wife becomes the protector of his progeny of sons and
grandsons, good conduct, himself and his dharma. The husband
enters his wife in the form of semen, becomes foetus and is born
as son. As he is born again through his wife thus, she is known as
‘Jaya’. Whichever type of husband woman gets, she begets that type
of son. Hence for the purity of the progeny, wife should be
protectd. Nobody can protect women by use of force. It is possible
to protect her by adopting the following means. She should be made
to work in gathering and spending money, keeping materials
including her body clean, following dharma, cooking food and
taking care of the house. Even if they are kept at home, they
cannot be said to be protected by their well - intentioned
husbands. Women, who protect themselves, are only protected. Women
will be spoiled by drinking liquor, association with evil persons,
separation from husband, roaming outside, sleeping at wrong time,
living in other persons’ homes etc. Women do not care for beauty
and age; they will enjoy men, whether handsome or ugly. Even if
protected with effort at home, as they are inclined to desire on
seeing men, unsteady mind and natural absence of love, they start
disliking husband. Man has to take extra effort to protect women
knowing this type of nature of women, which has come down from the
time Brahma started creation. Manu says that woman has as her
nature right from the start of creation, lying down always,
sitting, decorating herself, desire, anger, crookedness,
conspiracy against others and bad conduct. Woman picks up the
qualities of her duly married husband, like a river joning the
sea. Women, who bear children, are very fortunate, worthy of
adoration and add lustre to the home, are equal to Lakshmi; there
is no difference between them. Women have been created to bear
children and men to produce progeny. Hence Veda mentions Aadanam
with wife as a normal feature. It is obvious that woman is alone
responsible for delivering a child and protecting it and for day -
to - day activities. Woman performs various functions - bearing of
children, dharmic acts, service, superior pleasure and attainment
of Swarga for oneself and ancestors. If husband has to go to
another country for work, he should arrange for all needs of his
wife. If woman has to struggle for food and clothing, even if she
were good, she will become evil. When the husband has arranged for
food and clothing and left for another country, the wife should
remain at home, taking care of her chastity. If food and clothing
are not available, she can earn her living by blemishless
activities (like spinning etc.). When Dvijas (men of the first
three varnas) marry women of their own varna and other varna,
seniority and respect for the women occur in accordance with their
varna. The woman of same jati should only do bodily service to the
husband and daily observance of dharmic acts; not woman of a
different jati. One, who gets such services done by a woman of
jati different from his, even when woman of his own jati is
available, becomes a brahmana chandala, as mentioned earlier.
(Brahmana chandala is one born of a brahmana woman to a sudra
father). Married couple should so conduct themselves that there
will be no separation and transgression.
2. Daksha - If wife is favourable, there is no asrama greater than
Grihastha. A grihastha attains dharma, artha and kama through his
wife. It is certain that wife being favourable alone is swarga and
her being hostile is naraka. Even in swarga it is rare to find
mutual love in a couple. If one of them is loving and the other
does not respond, what greater misery can there be? For the
pleasure of the grihastha, wife alone is responsible. Wife is
called ‘Patni’ only when she is aware of grihastha dharmas, knows
her husband’s mind and is subordinate to him. For one, whose wife
is hostile, in addition to sorrow, there will be quarrel,
disharmony and mutual recrimination. For one who has two wives,
these features are specially applicable. Women are all like
leaches. Even if a woman is adored with ornaments, dress, food and
pleasures, she will demean her husband. The poor leach draws only
blood; woman draws wealth, mind, flesh, vitality and pleasure.
Woman, who was bashful in childhood and given to bodily pleasures
in youth, considers her husband like a grass in old age. If she is
not stopped out of misplaced love while initially indulging in bad
actions, she cannot be stopped later, like a disease ignored.
Woman, who is always favourable, happy, able, chaste and child -
bearing is Lakshmi herself. Woman, who is always joyous, able in
position and regard and doing acts liked by husband is alone
‘Jaya’; otherwise she is ‘Jara’ (old and eaten up). A husband, who
abandons in youth his wife, who is faultless and obedient, will
face being a woman and widow for seven generations. A wife, who
disgraces her husband, who is poor, diseased and idiotic, will be
born after death as dog and pig again and again. Woman, who fasts
and observes austerities while her husband is alive, steals the
life of the husband; she will go to naraka. One, whose disciple,
wife, child, brother, friend and dependent are obedient, is
honoured in the world.
3. Yagnavalkya - Woman, who does not resort to other men while her
husband is alive or dead, will get fame in this world. She will be
happy along with Parvati in the next world. Women should act as
told by their husbands. This is the best dharma for women. She
should await the return of her husband, who is afflicted with
great sins, after purification. Women should be honoured with
ornaments, dress, and food by husband, brother, father, relatives,
mother - in - law, father - in - law and brother - in - law. She
should keep things in right places at home and be capable, joyous,
economical in spending money and obedient to husband and prostrate
to the parents of husband. While husband is away to another place,
she should avoid sport, bathing luxuriously, witnessing crowds and
festivals, laughter and visit to others’ houses. Woman should be
protected by father in childhood, husband in youth and son in old
age and by close relatives in the absence of these. She is never
entitled to freedom. Woman, who acts to the liking and welfare of
husband, is of good conduct and has conquered her senses, attains
fame in this world and good state in the next. When wife of same
varna is there, husband should not get any dharmic act done by
woman of another varna. When there are many wives of same varna,
dharmic acts should not be got done by anyone other than the
eldest.
4. Sankar - Woman should not go out of house without information.
She should not be without top cover dress; not walk fast; not talk
to other men other than trader, sanyasi, old man and doctor. She
should not show her navel; she should wear her dress till the
ankle; not show off her breasts; not laugh without closing her
mouth. She should not hate her husband and his relatives. She
should not be in the same place with prostitute, evil woman, woman
of evil practices, sanyasini, astrologer woman, cheating woman and
fraudster. Due to association, good conduct will be affected.
5. Parasara - Wife, who dishonours her husband, who is poor,
diseased or idiotic, will be born many times as dog and pig in
later births. When husband is alive, woman, who observes fast and
vrata reduces the lifespan of husband; she will also go to naraka.
Manu says that vratas observed without permission of husband will
go to Rakshasas. One should not talk to woman, who wreaks evil to
relatives and persons of same jati and harms the foetus. Harming
the foetus is twice as harmful as Brahmahatya. There is no
Prayaschitta for it; one should keep her away.
6. Markandeya - Vratas etc. observed by woman without permission
from father, husband and son are fruitless.
7. Katyayana - Same as above.
8. Mahabharata states that the woman who has rendered service of
husband reaches a good state and that woman who has not done so,
but has observed vratas only does not attain a good state - “The
Lokapalaka, Yama then said: O blemishless one! Grieve not. Return.
You will not reach auspicious spheres. How can you, who were
always averse to own dharma, attain auspicious spheres? Husband
has been established by all Devas as God for woman. O woman! You
did not know your God owing to delusion. Worship of husband alone
is dharma for woman with husband in the world.”
9. Manu - Other than husband, there is no separate yaga, vrata or
fast for women. By serving her husband, woman is honoured in
Swarga. Husband alone is the giver of pleasure to woman during
period of fertility and other times and in this world and the
next. Even if husband is of bad conduct, loves another woman or is
devoid of good qualities, wife should consider her husband as God;
not leave him. Woman, who desires to get the world obtainable
through merit of dharmas performed with husband, should not do
anything not to the liking of her husband while alive or even
after his death. In childhood, youth and old age, even while at
her own home, she should not do anything of her own will. Woman
should be under the control of father in childhood, husband in
youth and in case of death of husband, that of sons; she should
not be free. She should not desire to be separate from father,
brother or sons. If separate, she will bring about downfall of
both the lineages. Woman should be always happy, capable in
household work, keep utensils etc. clean and not incur too much of
expense.
10. Katyayana - One who has many wives should get service for
Agnihotra etc. from wife of same varna. If there are many of the
same varna, he should get it done by the eldest, who is faultless.
Or, he should entrust it to wife who has borne good sons, is
obedient and capable, who speaks kindly and is pure. If not
possible, he should get it done by wife in the order of seniority
every day. If that is also not possible, wife should do the
service alone or together with others.
11. In Dharmasara - Lakshmi resides with all her aspects in a home
where there is no quarrel and the residents are respected.
12. Vyasa - A chaste woman should always worship her husband with
all three instruments - mind, speech and body, even if he were
ugly, of bad conduct, of evil nature, diseased, of evil spirits,
drunkard, angry, old, idiot, dumb, blind, deaf, terrible, poor,
miserly, inferior, afraid, given to gambling or women.
13. In Ratnavali - Similar.
14. Vyasa - Sitting at the entrance to home, looking out of the
window, bad words, laughter etc. are prohibited for a chaste
woman. A chaste woman, who is not affected by desirous looks of
others, being touched in a crowd, show of wealth etc. and who is
true to her husband in mind, seech and body is ornament of the
world. Woman, who does not go to another man even if prayed
devotedly, caught by force or adored with dresses etc. is chaste.
Woman, who does not look even if looked at by other men, laugh
even if other men laugh with her or talk even if talked by other
men, is chaste. Woman, who is youthful and is beautiful, expert in
music and dance and is still not affected by another man equal to
her, is chaste. Woman, who does not desire another man, endowed
with youth and handsomeness and capable of attracting women, is
very chaste. Woman, who eats after husband has finished eating,
grieves when husband grieves, is happy when husband is happy,
wears dirty clothes when husband is away in another country,
sleeps after husband has slept, wakes up before him and does not
even think of another man is chaste. She should be devoted to
father - and mother - in - law. She should be helpful in husband’s
dharmic activities; not spend too much; be keen on karmas; be pure
in her body; do auspicious deeds; always speak kind words to
husband. She should decorate her house and keep all materials in
the house clean. When husband returns from field, forest or
village, she should get up, speak kind words, make him sit on a
seat and make him happy by giving him water for washing feet. She
should have unlimited quantities of food, give food in time, be
humble, take care of foodgrains, and offer seat, food, danam,
honour and kind words in time as appropriate to gurus, sons,
friends, relatives, workers, male and female servants, guests,
bhikshus, sanyasis et al. She should save on household expenses
and not spend all of the money given by husband. But she should
not save out of money given for danam. Without husband’s
permission, she should not give money to relatives. She should
avoid drink and food not liked by husband. She should avoid the
following in front of husband - massaging oil, bath, brushing
teeth, combing hair, eating, vomiting, sleep, wearing dress and
ornaments. Woman who does not respond to the call of husband
immediately will be born a crow in 15 births. Woman who dishonours
husband out of lust, anger or jealousy will go to naraka in 7
births.
15. Atri - Woman who cheats her husband with her Pranas or money
will be born as a worm many times and then Chandali. Japa, tapas,
pilgrimage, sanyasa, repeated chanting of mantras and worship of
Devatas - these six are negative factors for women and sudras.
16. Vyasa - Chaste woman, who desires husband’s long life, should
not hate turmeric, kunkumam, sindooram, anjanam, blouse, betel -
leaves, auspicious ornaments, combing and pleating hair and
ornaments for hands, ears etc. Woman who gives Argyam in early
morning to Sun will not attain widowhood in 7 births. Devatas are
happy when she makes design of mandalam outside the house and
worships there with Akshatas etc. without mantras. Lakshmi resides
with all kalas in the house which shines with auspicious objects
and cleaning with cowdung etc. Woman, who does not offer bali to
Jyeshtha Devi according to her capacity out of the food she is
going to eat, will attain naraka. Women, who desire for sons,
grandsons and wealth, should offer bali to Jyeshtha Devi every
day.
17. Valmiki - For women, father, son, self, mother and friends
will not be the refuge; husband is the only refuge in this world
and the next. As women are of unsteady mind, they do not hold on
to help, lineage, vidya, danam and acquisitions. For chaste women
with good conduct, truth, adherence to sastras and equality,
husband is the best. Veena without string will not make sound;
chariot without wheel will not run; though having many sons, woman
without husband will not be happy.
18. Vyasa - For a chaste woman, keen on service of husband, there
is no sin in this world and the next. Chaste woman, established in
dharma, is verily Parvathi; no doubt. None can dishonour her at
any time.
19. Bodhayana - Woman keen on good of husband will attain to
Swarga.
105. Dharma of Pregnant Woman
1. Yagnavalkya - 16 nights from the day of start of menses are
called period of ‘Ritu’ (fertility). The couple should unite in
even nights in this period.
2. Parasara - If a woman, after post - menses bath, does not unite
with her husband, she will attain to naraka. She will also attain
widowhood in many births. Husband, who does not unite with wife
after post - menses bath, is guilty of killing of foetus; no
doubt. Garbhadhanam has been covered in detail earlier.
3. In Smritichandrika - Pregnant woman should not sit on grinder
and pestle; go under water; stay in deserted house; sit on
snakepit; grieve mentally; scratch on ground with nails, charcoal
and ash; lie down always; work hard; sit on husk, charcoal, ash,
bone and tile; conspire; stretch body; have hair untied and body
impure; lie down with head in north or in ditch, without dress,
grieving or wet feet; speak inauspicious words; laugh. She should
worship mother - and father - in - law. She should do auspicious
deeds, be clean - faced and do things to the liking and good of
husband.
4. In Smritiratnam - Pregnant woman should not—eat, bathe in
sandhya times; go near foot of tree any time; be lying down
always; stay in the shade of cot. She should bathe in warm water
mixed with herbs. She should have raksha; wear ornaments; do Vastu
pooja; do danam; do Parvati’s Naktavrata on Tritiya. She should
observe these rules specially during pregnancy. Son born to such a
woman will have long life. Otherwise the offspring will be
affected; no doubt.
5. Yagnavalkya - If pregnant woman is not given what she desires,
her offspring will be affected by disfigurement or death; hence
one should do what she desires.
6. In Susrutham - From the start of pregnancy, woman should
avoid—physival labour, hard work, heavy eating, sleep during day,
wakefulness at night, grief, fear, getting into vehicles,
squatting with legs bent up, discharge of blood. If she is given
objects of her desire, she will beget son of courage and long
life.
7. Pregnancy should be recognised by signs. The signs have been
mentioned oin Susrutham - exhaustion, tiredness, thirst,
uneasiness in thighs, vibration in vagina.
8. Brihaspati - Same as above.
9. Kasyapa - Pregnant woman should avoid, in addition to those in
item 3 above, carving, getting on to elephant, horse, pungent
food.
10. In Garbhopanishad - In Ritu period, through union, the semen
and blood mix. In 7 days, it becomes a bubble. In 15 days, it
becomes semi - solid; in 1 month, it becomes hard. In 2nd month
head is formed; in 3rd month, feet; in 4th month, fingers, belly,
waist; in 5th month, spine; in 6th month, nose, eyes, ears. In 7th
month, it becomes a jiva. In 8th month, it attains fullness. In
case of predominance of semen, male child is formed; in case of
blood, female child; if both semen and blood are equal, eunuch. If
conception takes place from agitated parents, the child becomes
blind, lame, hunchback, dwarf. Due to force of Vayu, if semen
enters in two streams, twins are conceived. In 9th month, the
foetus is complete in all respects; it remembers previous births
and past good and bad deeds and wails thus—I went through many
thousands of births; ate several kinds of foods; drank milk from
many breasts; I go through birth and death again and again;
Immersed in the sea of sorrow, I do not know the way of
emancipation; when I come out of this uterus, I shall take refuge
in Sankhya, Yoga etc. which will give me good results and destroy
evil; I shall worship Maheswara; I shall take refuge in Bhagavan
Narayana. I did so many acts for the sake of relatives; benefitted
by them, they went away. I am alone being burnt due to those sins.
The being, grieving thus, comes out of the small orifice of vagina
of mother and suffers a lot. On being born, it is touched by
Vishnu’s vayu and forgets all about previous births and becomes
inert.
11. Yagnavalkya - The jiva, born out of the mixture of semen and
blood, is of liquid form having the five essential dhatus
(elements) in the 1st month. It hardens in 2nd month; in 3rd
month, parts of body and sense - organs develop; it gains the
qualities of Panchabhutas - space, air, fire, water and earth. In
4th month the parts of body become firm; in 5th month blood forms;
in 6th month, strength, complexion, nails, hair develop; in 7th
month, mind, consciousness, nerves, bones, blood vessels etc.
develop; in 8th month, skin, flesh, memory develop. In this month,
the quality of ‘Ojas’ keeps travelling from mother to the foetus
and back to the mother frequently. That is why the child born in
8th month is lifeless. In 9th or 10th month, the baby is pushed
out like an arrow, from the small orifice in the machine of
mother’s body by strong airs of delivery. ‘Ojas’ is the object in
the heart, clean, somewhat reddish and acidic.
106. Widows’ Dharmas
1. Yagnavalkya - A widowed woman should not live separate from
mother, father, son, brother, mother - in - law, father - in - law
or uncle; if separate, she will be despised. This is applicable if
she observes brahmacharya in view of Vishnusmriti, which says that
if husband dies, wife can die along with him or live with
brahmacharya.
2. Vyasa - Woman, who observes brahmacharya after her husband’s
death, will reach Swarga and enjoy pleasures with husband. Widow’s
hair binds her husband; hence she should shave her head. She
should eat once; not second time. She should observe vratas of
fast for 3 days, 5 days, 15 days and 1 month. She may observe
‘kruchchras’ (prayaschittas) like Chandrayanam. She should
maintain life with barley food, fruits, vegetables, milk vrata
etc. till life ebbs. If she lies down in a cot, she will push her
husband into naraka; hence she should lie down on floor only. She
should not have luxurious bath; not use perfumes. She should offer
tarpanam every day with kusa and til to her husband, his father
and his grandfather by uttering their names and gotra. She should
consider Vishnu as her husband and worship. She should meditate on
Vishnu as her husband. Widow who observes thus is also called
chaste (Pativrata).
3. Aasvalayana - Widow without son or with child son should
approach her father or relatives and live with discipline. She
should do japa like sudra. She should worship Surya every day and
meditate on husband alone. Nothing else is laid down.
4. Parasara - Widow who observes brahmacharya goes to Swarga, like
famous brahmacharis.
5. Manu - After death of husband, widow should have light food
with pure flower, root, fruit etc and shrink her body. She should
not utter even the name of another man. One who observes
brahmacharya in this manner will go to Swarga, like brahmacharis
like Sanaka. If widows, sanyasis and brahmacharis use one of the
three items, betel - leaf, nut or lime, it will be equal to meat.
If they use all three, it will be equal to liquor.
6. Aapasthambha - Widow should observe, as long as she lives,
bath,food one time, sleeping on floor, brahmacharya and avoidance
of pungent food, salt, honey and meat.
107. Anugamanam (Joining Husband on Funeral Pyre)
1. Vishnu - After death of husband, wife should either observe
brahmacharya or die on his funeral pyre.
2. Parasara - Man has 3 ½ crores of hair; wife, who does
Anugamanam will live in Swarga for 3 ½ crores of years.
3. Haaritha - Same as above; she purifies the lineages of her
mother, father and husband.
4. Parasara says that she will not enjoy Swarga alone; but like a
snake - charmer would charm a snake from its pit, she would spirit
away her husband forcefully from naraka, even if he happens to be
there and enjoy with him in Swarga.
5. Trikandi - A Pativrata wife will spirit away her husband from
naraka, if he happens to be there because of sins and enjoy with
him in Swarga for 10000 years per each hair of hers. Messemgers of
Yama run away from a distance on seeing her husband.
6. Sankar, Angiras - That Pativrata will enjoy in Swarga with her
husband for a period lasting that of 14 Indras, adored by Apsara
women. Wife, who does Anugamanam, makes her husband sinless, even
if he is guilty of killing brahmana or friend or of being
ungrateful. Wife, who enters the fire on death of her husband, is
equal to Arundhati and is honoured in Swarga. Woman is not freed
of her birth as woman till she enters fire on death of her
husband.
7. Angiras - For Pativrata women, there is no dharma other than
entering fire, on death of husband. Know that Pativrata is that
woman who suffers while husband suffers, is happy while husband is
happy, is emaciated while husband is away in another country and
dies on his death.
8. Upamanyu - Whether wife is of brahmana varna or of other caste,
if she is childless, there is no course for her other than
Anugamanam.
9. In Vignanesvariyam on this matter - This dharma applies
commonly to all women right upto chandala caste, unless they are
pregnant or have small children.
10. In Smritiratnam also - Same as above.
11. Ourva - Women, who have small children, are pregnant, not
attained maturity or in menses period should not do Anugamanam.
12. In a different Smriti - Same as above.
13. In a different book - If women who are impure after child -
birth or in menses are desirous of Anugamanam, they are purified
by doing so. Some say that Anugamanam is prohibited for pregnant
women and is optional for others.
14. Vyasa through the guise of story of dove - That chaste female
dove entered the dazzling fire. It then got its husband, who was
wearing nice armlets. The male dove reached Swarga along with its
female and enjoyed there, praised by Devas.
15. There is also prohibition on Anugamanam in Smriti for brahmana
woman. Paitinasi - By the order of Brahma, there is no Anugamanam
for brahmana woman. It is the best dharma for women of other
varnas.
16. Virat - Wife should act harmoniously with husband while he is
alive. On his death, she should not do Anugamanam. She should live
and do dharma which will be good for the husband. If she does
Anugamanam, she will attract the sin of suicide.
17. Angiras - If brahmana woman does Anugamanam, she does not
reach Swarga, nor does she get her husband to Swarga.
18. Vyaghrapada - “Brahmana woman should not die along with her
husband, overcome by grief. If she dies, she will get the sin of
suicide. If she is alive, she will get the fate of a sanyasi.”
Vignanesvariyam, Madhaviyam, Smritiratnam and other such books
state that the above statements refer to a separate funeral pyre,
not the same pyre of her husband. Hence Usanas says that brahmana
woman should not get on to another pyre; for other women, this is
the best dharma.
19. But in Apararga - The following statement applies to women
other than brahmana women - “If husband dies in another country,
Pativrata wife should embrace her husband’s footwear and enter
fire with faith. Know her power. She will not enjoy Swarga alone;
but like a snake - charmer would charm a snake from its pit, she
would spirit away her husband forcefully from naraka, even if he
happens to be there bound cruelly by ropes by Yama’s servants, and
enjoy with him in Swarga, adored by Deva women, for the period of
14 Indras.”
20. Vignanesvara - Sruti says ‘One should not die, desirous of
Swarga, before the end of his or her lifespan’. This does not mean
that Anugamanam is improper. One, who is desirous of Moksha,
should not reduce his or her lifespan for the sake of Swarga. In
the rest of her life, removing mental impurities by performing
nitya and naimittika karmas; by attaining Atmagnanam through
sravanam (hearing), mananam (meditation) and nididhyasanam
(contemplation); one can attain Moksha, which is attainment of
Brahman, of the form of eternal and unparalleled Bliss. Hence one
should not lose life for the sake of short - lived and inferior
pleasure; this is the meaning. Hence Anugamanam is suitable for
wife, desirous of Swarga and not Moksha, like other kamya karmas.
21. This Anugamanam will bring merit to both wife and husband if
adopted by Pativrata woman; if adopted by sinful woman, her sins
get attenuated. Vyasa and Saatatapa say that if even women, who
dishonoured husband with evil mind and were adverse to husband, do
Anugamanam even out of desire, anger, fear or delusion, become
freed from sin. Pativrata woman, who does acts liked by husband
right from beginning, reaches auspicious worlds along with
husband, if she does Anugamanam.
22. In Puranasaram, Narada says to a brahmana woman - O woman! Sin
accrued out of association with other man or other reasons gets
destroyed on entering fire. If Pativrata woman, keen on service of
husband, does Anugamanam, the couple reach Swarga for certain.
108. Censure of unchaste woman
1. Yagnavalkya - Unchaste woman should be kept at home in a
powerless, unattractive and dishonoured condition with just enough
food for living and be made to sleep on floor.
2. Manu - Woman, who unites with another man other than husband
with desire for child, is censured in this world and will not
reach a good state hereafter. She will be born a wolf; caught by
terrible diseases. Even if husband is inferior, if woman lusts
after another superior man, she will be despised in this world;
she will be called ’Parapoorva’. Son born from another man is not
a son; similarly son born of woman other than wife is also not a
son. No Sastra permits a second husband for a Pativrata woman.
3. Sruti - Woman cannot have two husbands.
4. Yagnavalkya - Sin generated out of adultery is purified through
Ritu. If woman bears a child through adultery or is guity of
killing of foetus or husband or great sin, she should be
abandoned. Purification through Ritu refers to mentaladultery. If
woman bears a child with a sudra man, she should be abandoned.
Manusmriti says that if women of brahmana, kshatriya and vaisya
varnas, on union with sudra man, do not become pregnant, they get
purified through Prayaschittam; others do not. Smriti says that
woman who unites with disciple or Guru or kills husband or
pratilomaja should be abandoned. Abandonment means keeping her
away from pleasures and dharmic deeds; not total abandonment, as
rules state that husband should keep the guilty woman at his home
only, but subdued.
5. Usanas - Adulterous wife should be given low class dress and
food, dishonoured, made powerless and made to observe
Prayaschittam including Chandrayanam or Prajapatyam.
6. Yagnavalkya - Vrata stipulated for men who unite with women
other than wife should be enforced on woman who unites with men
other than husband.
7. Bhrigu - Man 80 years old or less than 16 years old, women and
sick persons shall observe half the Prayaschittam.
8. Manu - After Prayaschittam, woman should not be treated with
contempt. This is because prior to marriage, Soma, Gandharva and
Agni enjoyed woman and gave her cleanliness, sweet words and
general purity. Hence women are pure.
9. Aapasthambha stipulates Prayaschittam for man who renounces
wife without any reason and woman who renounces husband without
reason - Man who renounced wife should wear donkey skin with hair
outside and beg for alms in 7 homes saying ‘Please give bhiksha to
this man who renounced wife’; he should do this for 6 months.
Woman who renounced husband should observe Prajapatya kruchchram
for 6 months.
109. Dharmas of Grihasthas (Householders)
1. Daksha - Grihastha has 9 vidhas, 9 eashaddanas, 9 karmas, 9
vikarmas, 9 prachchannas, 9 prakasyas, 9 saphalas, 9 nishphalas
and 9 adeyas. These navakas (9 things) will glorify the grihastha.
Vidhas (customs): - To be done - On arrival of elders at home,
getting up with full attention of mind; eyes; face and kind words;
saying ‘please come’; speaking kind words right at beginning (i.e.
without waiting for the guest to speak); honouring; following the
guest. Eashaddanas (small gifts): - Minimum to be given - Giving
the guest place; water; grass for sitting; washing the feet with
water; application of oil; seat; facility for sleeping; food;
drinking water. Even poor people can afford to give these.
Grihastha should not eat without the guest having eaten. Karmas: -
To be done - Sandhyavandanam; ritual bath; japa; homa;
Brahmayagna; Devapuja; Vaisvadevam; Awaiting guest; honouring the
guest as per capacity. Vikarmas: - Karmas not to be done - Bearing
tales; untruth; cheating; kama (desire); anger; absence of love;
hate; hypocrisy; treachery. (Also, dance, music, agriculture,
service, trade, making salt, , carrying weapons - these are
inferior for a brahmana). Prachchannas (secrets not to be made
public): - Age; wealth; household secret; mantra; sexual union;
medicine; austerity (tapas); gift (danam); disgrace. Prakasyas
(Matters to be made public): - Lending for interest; closure of
loan; danam; adhyayanam (Vedic study); sale; giving daughter away;
vrishabhotsarjanam; sin committed in secret; freedom from blame.
Saphalas (Fruitful acts): - Giving to mother; father; guru;
friend; humble follower; helpful person; poor; orphan; man of good
conduct. Nishphalas (Fruitless acts): - Giving to evil person;
flattering bard; boxer; bad doctor; gambler; cheat; angry man;
wanderer; thief. Adeyas (materials not to be given): - Common
materials; materials obtained by begging; materials on pledge;
materials on deposit; wife; wife’s belongings; wife’s property
obtained as gift; materials on temporary deposit; entire wealth
when descendant is there. These 9 materials are not to be given to
others even in emergency. If given, the giver should do
Prayaschittam. Lakshmi does not leave in this world as well as the
next, a brahmana, who observes the above 9 sets of 9 each.
Praise of Grihasthasrama:
2. Manu - Out of men of the four asramas, grihastha is said to be
the best as Veda directly stipulates karmas like Aadhanam to him
and he protects men of the other three asramas. As all rivers and
rivulets merge in the sea, men of all asramas join the grihastha.
Grihastha, who does karmasanyasa, removes sins generated out of
karmas and studies Vedas with discipline, gets son and wealth and
lives comfortably. Brahma has said that son is called ‘Putra’ as
he saves father from the naraka called ‘Put’. One, who does
karmasanyasa and performs karmas with no desire thus, removes sins
and reaches the best state.
3. Here sanyasa means abandoning kamya karmas, i.e. karmas with
desire for fruit. Bhagavad Gita says thus - Wise men say that
abandoning kamya karmas is sanyasa. It is not abandoning nitya
karmas (karmas to be done daily compulsorily). One should not
leave yagna, danam and tapas; they must certainly be done. They
are purifying agents for the wise. My view is that one should do
these karmas without attachment and desire for fruit. O Arjuna!
One who performs karmas without attachment and surrenders them to
Brahman is not affected by sins like lotus leaf by water. Yogis
perform karmas with mind, speech and body and sense - organs
without attachment and for purification of mind. One who performs
karmas without expecting fruits attains Mukti; others are bound.
4. Daksha - One who performs karmas is alone called ‘Grihi’. One
who has abandoned svakarmas does not become a grihastha merely by
living at home and having wife and children. As Devas, humans and
animals are dependent on grihastha for their daily survival, he is
superior to men of other asramas. Just as all living beings depend
on mother for survival, all bhikshus depend on grihastha for
survival. Grihastha is said to be the support of all the four
asramas. If he grieves, people of other asramas grieve. The stem
of a tree is supported on its root. Branches arise from the stem.
Leaves are there in the branches. If root is destroyed, all the
rest perish. Hence one should protect the grihastha somehow. The
king and people of other asramas should protect and honour the
grihastha. One who has the qualities of compassion, bashfulness,
forgiveness, faith, knowledge, sacrifice and gratefulness is said
to be the best grihastha.
5. Vyasa - One who chants Vedas every day, wears yagnopavita,
speaks truth and has conquered anger attains Brahmasayujya. One
who performs without break sandhyavandanam, ritual bath and
brahmayagna and is free from jealousy, is soft and has conquered
sense - organs attains best worlds. Grihastha, free from desire,
fear, anger, greed and delusion, who has not left Gayatri japa and
performs sraadhas becomes liberated. One, who does good to
parents, cows and brahmanas, performs yagas, and is devoted to
Devas is honoured in Brahmaloka. One, who is after dharma, artha
and kama, worships Devatas, adores Devatas every day and has
patience and compassion is said to be grihastha. By merely living
at home one does not become a grihastha. He should perform good
karmas as per capacity; leave bad karmas. By leaving delusion and
attaining high level of yoga, he becomes free from the bondage of
samsara; no doubt.
6. Parasara - One who satisfies Pitrus by sraadham, Devas by
yagnas, guests by food, Rishis by Vedas, Brahma by son, bhutas by
bali and all beings by kindness reaches auspicious worlds.
Sanyasis and brahmacharis, who eat food obtained from alms,
survive on grihastha. Hence grihasthasramam is the best.
Grihastha, who observes all rules, attains best worlds.
7. Yagnavalkya - Chanting of Vedas, yagas, brahmacharya, tapas,
self - control, faith, fast and independence are causes of
Atmagnanam. Atma should be known by this path by people of all
asramas. Atma must be understood through listening to Vedanta;
enquired through intellect. Then Atma will be known indirectly.
Dvijas, who, with great faith, resort to lonely land and worship
this true Atma, attain to Paramatma. They reach in sequence
Devatas of Agni, daytime, bright half (Sukla paksha), Uttarayanam,
Devaloka, Surya and Vidyut (lightning). Then Manasa Purusha
reaches them to Brahmaloka. There is no return for them to this
samsara. Those, who conquer Swarga by yagna, danam and tapas,
reach in sequence Devatas of smoke (dhumam), night, dark half
(Krishna paksha), Dakshinayanam, Pitruloka and Chandra and enjoy
the fruits of merit. Then they reach Vayu, rain, water and earth
and become sukla (semen) through foodgrains like paddy and are
born as living beings. They reach upper worlds again in the same
way. One who does not gert to follow these two routes is born as
snake, worm, insect etc. Grihastha, who earns money through proper
means, is kind to guests, performs nitya and naimittika sraadhas,
speaks truth and is keen on Atmagnanam, also attains Mukti.
8. For people of all asramas, attainment of Atma is achievable
through direct experience. Worshippers reach Brahman by Archiradi
marga (the route of light - Agni, daytime etc.) Those who perform
kamya karmas attain Swarga by Dhoomadi marga (the route of smoke
etc.) and return to earth on the exhaustion of merit. The import
is that Mukti is not only for Sanyasi; but also for the grihastha,
who performs karmas and is tattvagnani (knower of Truth).
9. Sruti also - Knower of Brahman becomes Brahman itself.
Worshippers reach in sequence Devatas of Agni, daytime, bright
half (Sukla paksha), Uttarayanam, Year, Surya, Chandra and Vidyut
(lightning). Then Manasa Purusha reaches them to Brahmaloka. This
is the Devayana route. Performers of karmas reach in sequence
Devatas of smoke (dhumam), night, dark half (Krishna paksha),
Dakshinayanam, Pitruloka, Akasa and Chandra and enjoy the fruits
of merit. Then they return via Akasa, Vayu, smoke, cloud, rain,
water and earth and become foodgrains like paddy, barley, herbs,
trees, sesame, urid dal etc. To come out of these states is very
tough. They join him who eats the paddy etc. and reach woman
through semen. If those jivas had performed good karmas, they are
born in one of the three advanced varnas. If they had done bad
karmas, they are born in despicable births like dog, pig, chandala
and the like. The import of Chandogya Sruti is that worshippers
reach Paramapadam (Supreme state) by Archiradi marga, while
performers of karmas reach auspicious worlds by Dhoomadi marga and
return to earth again by the route of Akasa etc.
10. Manu - One who observes dharmas as mentioned in Sruti and
smritis attains fame in this world and reaches glorious and
auspicious worlds later.
11. Bhagavan also - One who observes entire Varnasrama dharma and
worships Me attains Gnana in the same birth and reaches auspicious
state.
12. Bodhayana - Brahmana, who always wears yagnopavita and carries
kamandalu, chants Veda every day, keeps off food of sudra, unites
with wife in Ritu period and performs homas as laid down, never
falls from Brahmaloka. Grihastha, who is austere, chants Veda,
performs yaga and has conquered sense - organs, should produce
progeny in woman of same varna. He pays off debts to Rishis by
chanting Veda, to Indra by Somayaga and to Pitrus by son and
enjoys in Swarga. He wins worlds by son; gets joy by grandson;
reaches Swarga by great - grandson. Veda states that brahmana is
born with three debts. Freedom from debt happens through progeny.
As long as progeny is there, he reaches imperishable worlds. One,
who has a good son, reaches the previous 7 generations and future
7 generations and himself, thus totalling 15 people, to glorious
state. Hence one should beget a son. By producing a son, one
produces himself. Son is himself - so says Sruti. Acharyas say
that Grihasthasrama is the only one that exists, as others do not
have progeny.
13. Gautama - Grihastha is the point of genesis of other asramas,
as others do not have the right to produce progeny. As Sruti
specifically stipulates Grihasthasrama, that is the only asrama.
Persons produced by grihastha alone get the right to be in the
four asramas, as producing progeny is prohibited by Sastra in
respect of others. Children produced by people of other asramas in
violation of Sastra’s prohibition are not entitled to any asrama.
Saatatapa Smriti states that Sanyasis, tapasvis and brahmacharis
who violate their asrama rules are chandalas. Children born to
them should be made to live with chandalas. In all Vedas,
Dharmasastras, Puranas and Itihasas, it is only grihasthas who are
described and praised in a majority. Hence that is the only
asramam. Many teachers think that the other asramas are specified
for those who lack power. Gita also states that Janaka et al
attained Sidhdhi by performing karmas.
14. Aapasthambha - It is certain that for the best of those who
are knowers of Vedas in text and meaning, Vedas are the only
authority in matters beyond the senses. Jaimini says that what is
stipulated in Veda is dharma. Hence they say that conduct in
violation of Vedic karmas is not authority. It amounts to saying
that as karmas like Agnihotra are alone stipulated with clear
import in all branches of Vedas, Grihasthasrama alone is the best,
if Vedas are authority. But burning ground is mentioned for
grihasthas in statement: ‘they reached cremation ground’; here
cremation ground refers to ‘Pitrumedha’ stipulated after many
karmas like Agnihotra; this does not mean that they became ghosts
and remained in burning ground. This is because good fruit of
Swarga is mentioned after the karma of cremation ground: - ‘the
performer reaches Swarga’. Further, Veda says that producing
progeny is immortality: - ‘O Mortal! You are born as your son;
that is immortality for you; you do not die, as you exist in the
form of son’. This is sensible. Father himself is seen directly as
a separate entity. It is only that their bodies are different.
They appear the same. If the sons observe the prescribed karmas,
they enhance the fame and stay in Swarga of their grandfathers et
al; thus the succeeding generation enhances the fame and residence
in Swarga of the previous generations. They reside in Swarga till
the Mahabhutapralaya. Bhavishya Puranam says that even after
dissolution, they become the seeds of the next creation. Brahma’s
saying is also there to support the glory of Grihasthasrama - “Let
us stay with those who chant Veda, unite with woman in non -
prohibited period, produce progeny, are devoted and do tapas,
yagnas and danam in the land between Ganga and Yamuna (Antarvedi);
they alone are our benefactors. One who follows other asrama is
destroyed and becomes dirt.” But if it is argued that just as the
sons who observe the prescribed karmas enhance the fame and stay
in Swarga of their ancestors, the sons who observe prohibited
karmas enhance the infamy and stay in naraka of their ancestors,
Aapasthambha says - ‘Those who commit sins in a lineage get
destroyed themselves; they do not spoil the ancestors. If a leaf
in a tree is spoiled by worm etc., that leaf will fall off; it
does not bring down the branch or the tree. Similarly for the
ancestors, there is no relationship with the karmas of their
successors on earth. This is an example. Just as there is no
doership for the father et al in karmas of son, there is also no
relationship for them with the fruit of karmas. The following is
the reason for saying that sinners alone perish. This creation
from Devas down till animals is that of Hiranyagarbha and Rishis
like Marichi. They continue in their positions without being
affected. For example - The bodies of great meritorious persons
like Vasishtha shine brilliantly, like the mandalam of
Saptarishis. Sruti also says - ‘Stars are actually the brilliance
of the meritorious’. This is proof of the fact that ancestors are
not affected by sons’ misdeeds. It is possible that a person in
another asrama can conquer the perishable world with his own body
by the balance of merit left after enjoyment or by arduous tapas;
he may attain sidhdhi by mere will; it only means that it is not
the greatness of his asrama that is responsible for it. Know that
grihasthasrama is praised in this manner. Because Aapasthambha
says that one who is careful in observing Sastra in all asramas
attains wellbeing and fearless state.
15. Vasishtha - It is only grihastha who performs yaga; tapas; he
is the best among persons of the four asramas.
Note: Some sections dealing with dharmas of Vanaprastha and
Sanyasa asramas follow.
OM TAT SAT